Darwin, evolution, and Kimberly Clark Products

I have come to the conclusion that evolution is not all that it is cracked up to be. I do think that Darwin had it figured out but that does not make the system sound or fool proof. Why have I come to this conclusion? Why would this be an item that would even weight on my mind?

It started with my sister. My sister is known for her remarkable but erratic brilliance. She was lamenting on the issue of reproduction and the female body’s need to ache, swell, retain water, and just leave her in an unmistakably horrid mood. I know that any man reading this is familiar with the “mood.” My advice... drop the Doritos and back away very, very slowly… she may charge.

Back to Darwin… is this the best form of reproduction that evolution can come up with? Simply women have one good week a month. You are pre, post or during the rest of the month. Does this limit our ability to work, create or be productive citizens of the world? NO! We are still viable and function well but give me a break.

First let us converse about Kimberly Clark Products. Female items that require purchase monthly. Mind you it is not a one size fits all kind of thing. Light, regular or heavy? Wings? Plastic or cardboard? Tylenol, Aleve, Midol… Morphine… Vicodin… This investment could easily run into $15 monthly. That does not seem too bad until you figure out a life time of use. $15 x 12months= $180. $180 x 35 years = $6,300. Now lets multiply the U.S. female population of 143 million x $180 =25,740,000,000.

YIKES! Now you understand why feminine product advertisements are every where and never ending. We are talking big business to feel fresh and clean.

This is just the tip of the iceberg. We have not touched on sexual intercourse and pregnancy. I surmised that women have one good week a month. I guess that is the window of opportunity for sexual contact. Ah, clarification of the head ache issue for some.

Then add pregnancy to the evolution scale… morning sickness, swollen ankles, being poke and prodded every other week and the need to urinate every tick of the clock and you have a glowing woman on the edge… drop the (insert food of choice) and back away very, very slowly… she may charge.

And we are called the weaker sex… Right you keep thinking that and remember to back away very slowly…..